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How to Know a Person

The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen

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How to Know a Person

Written by: David Brooks
Narrated by: David Brooks
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About this listen

Brought to you by Penguin.

A practical, heartfelt guide to the art of truly knowing another person in order to foster deeper connections at home, at work, and throughout our lives - from the #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Road to Character and The Second Mountain

If you are going to care for someone, you must first understand them. If you're going to hire, marry, or befriend someone, you have to be able to see them. If you are going to work closely with someone, you have to be able to make them feel recognized and valued. As David Brooks observes, "The older I get, the more I come to the certainty that there is one skill at the center of any healthy family, company, classroom, community or nation: the ability to see each other, to know other people, to make them feel valued, heard and understood."

And yet we humans don't do this well. All around us are people who feel invisible, unseen, misunderstood. In How to Know a Person, Brooks sets out to help us to do better, posing questions that are essential for all of us. If you want to know a person, what kind of attention should you cast on them? What kind of conversations should you have? What parts of a person's story should you pay attention to?

Driven by his trademark sense of curiosity, Brooks draws from the fields of psychology and neuroscience, and from the worlds of theatre, history, and education, to present a welcoming, hopeful, integrated approach to human connection. How to Know a Person helps listeners become more understanding and considerate towards others; it helps listeners find the joy that comes from being seen. Along the way it offers a possible remedy for a society that is riven by fragmentation, hostility, and misperception.

The act of seeing another person, Brooks argues, is a profoundly creative act: How can we look somebody in the eye and see something large in them, and in turn, see something larger in ourselves? How to Know a Person is for anyone searching for connection, seeking to understand and yearning to be understood.

©2023 David Brooks (P)2023 Penguin Audio
Communication & Social Skills Social Psychology & Interactions Success

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Simple and applicable

A lot of what is covered in the book are important things that we seem to overlook. I really liked the structure, the stories and the simplicity with which the author conveyed their ideas. A lot of references from the book are also finding their way into my reading list. Lovely book.

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Great insights about Oneself to be selfless

Loved listening as I kept going…..wonderful insights shared by the author to understand ourselves, how to be empathetic, how to ask good questions, what are the best ways to engage with others and many more things…..highly recommended and happy listening 😊

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The author and the performer are one

The book is well researched and is a source material for anyone who is interested in pursuing this line of thought- how to know people. The author himself is the performer thus has created the work twice. In the reading , it seems, he believes what he has written, thus making the content more authentic. Thanks

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