What is Imposter syndrome? Explaining away your accomplishments and success and doubting your abilities

1. What are common examples of imposter syndrome?

2. How can you assess if you have imposter syndrome Take the quiz:

Do you chalk your success up to luck, timing, or computer error?
Do you believe that if I can do it, anyone can?

Do you agonize over small flaws in your work?

Are you crushed by even constructive criticism, seeing it as evidence of your ineptness?

When you succeed, do you feel like you fooled them again?

Do you worry that it’s a matter of time before you’re found out?

3. What are some statements or excuses often made by people suffering from imposter syndrome?

4. Where does I.S. come from?

5. Mastery vs Performance – Dweck.

6. What are some NLP Techniques used to Overcome Imposter Syndrome

Conflict of identities, Belief changes, trauma processes, auditory swishes for neg. Self-talk. Anchoring and resource anchoring, changing the history of a problem (anchoring), reframing, modeling (understanding the model of success in your field,) meta programs, Foreground, background process - create a strong association between what is most important in the person’s awareness (foreground) and something that they are not attending to (background).

7. Bandura curve – 1st part, beliefs of capability; 2nd part beliefs of identity.

8. In time/ through time

9. recap

Support the show

1. What is important about stories, and metaphors in communication? When someone studies the great communicators, past and present, they all use metaphors and analogies to illustrate their points.
Metaphors compare things that are less understandable to familiar things. They create new meanings, make complex ideas understandable, motivate interest, and influence ideas. They create images that people can understand rather than literal words

2. What is the difference between a story, metaphor, and an analogy? A simple story conveys a description of something. A metaphor communicates two or more levels of meaning. Using metaphors can deliver directly to the unconscious.

3. How do individual words represent our experience as metaphors? George Lakoff and Mark Johnson in their book, Metaphors We Live By state, that metaphor is pervasive in everyday life not just in language by also by thought and action. This is the concept system. It is metaphorical in nature. Our concepts structure how we perceive the world around us. Much of our language is metaphors. So we cannot get along by language alone. How we experience our everyday life is metaphorical. Communication is war. Communication is dance. Love is a journey, time is money, love is madness

4. As one of the most important and overlooked skills in communication, how can we get better at using them in everyday interactions as well as speeches? Listen to how you use words to describe things in your world. Listen to how others use words to describe their world. Look at situations – what are they like in unrelated areas? Be more intentional about listening to others. Deeper insight into people. Linking abstract ideas to concrete

Support the show

How do we break patterns?

Outcome, outcome, outcome

Remember, that in the NLP model, all experience has structure. When you explore and change the structure, your experience changes, the perception, meaning, and feeling. NLP creates specific changes rather than random, trial-and-error changes. It changes things by adding resources, not taking away anything.

Our experience and patterns are organized on a hierarchy of neurology from Environment, Behavior, Capability, Belief/Value, Identity, and Spiritual. Each level organizes the level underneath it. Changes at a higher level will change something underneath it but not necessarily the other way around. It is important to understand what logical level a change needs to take place for the change to be effective and long-lasting. The neuro-levels are important because they are part of a unified field that includes yourself, others' observer positions, and past present, and future. Patterns can be caused at a behavioral level, cap, belief, or identity. Interestingly, people are aware of the patterns they run (or not) but not aware of what causes them. Changing the cause at the root of the problem will create lasting change and have the change in all three primary channels.

6-step reframing behaviors, internal dialog, nail-biting, etc can be changed with parts negotiation unless it is on a higher logical level. the lower the level, the more immediate the results, and the higher, the longer the integration because it is unconscious. Anchoring can also change our states, and give us choices, and as a result, a pattern can change. If it works for a while and then comes back, you probably need a change at a higher logical level.

How do we change our beliefs?

Be aware that most people cannot do their own belief work because beliefs are submerged in our unconscious mind. It takes someone excellent at recognizing patterns, calibration, and asking questions to discover limiting beliefs.

The first step is knowing what belief to change. This is challenging since beliefs run in packs and are slippery, according to Robert Dilts. They are mostly unconscious, in systems with a core belief that is young and hidden. One approach is to look at the behavior and ask, what do I believe to do this? What do I see hear and feel? What happens just before I start the behavior? Understand what it does for us, the positive intent and the goal of the intention, what are counterexamples to the belief, and finally, what behavior I want to do and what would I have to believe to do that behavior. And then, of course, belief statements are simple, they are beliefs, not behaviors, and have no ecological downsides.

How do we communicate most effectively?

Simply by speaking to another’s understanding. We communicate the way we understand words. So people who are like us, understand us and people not like us don’t. It limits the number of people we can connect with and promotes a lot of misunderstanding and miscommunication.

The more we are like a person the more the understanding.

The skills to engage for excellence in communication: perceptual positions, calibration, sensory awareness, rapport (m and p) and to influence, and lead. Ask questions (curiosity), state management, and control over your own internal dialogue.

Support the Show.