Showing results by author "Meatball Fulton" in All Categories

These are stories about gangsters, bimbos, cons, cops, detectives, lovers, losers, platinum blondes, high heels, mink coats, and neon signs reflecting on rain-slicked streets.

Joe and Moe are two guys sitting in a bar talking about women, cons, cops, capers and Lady Luck. Among their stories: "A Fine Lot of Lollipops": two punks make the mistake of hijacking a truck belonging to Big Louis; plus "The Lollipop King"; "Miracles and Wonder Bread", "Nina the Nudist", "Night Train to El Paso", "Don't Shoot Live Poets", "Life Dangling Lessons", "All Good Hoofers Go to Heaven"; and 13 more!

Mojo receives a call from "The Whistle Stop Hobby Shop". He's told his pocket watch has arrived. It's a gift from someone named "Rufus". But the pocket watch has no hands or numbers, just an opaque face that reminds Mojo of a zombie's eye. Mojo is mistaken for the detective, Rufus. He's hired to find Angelina, the missing sister of Philadelphia gangster Tony Rizzo. By using his watch as a portal, Mojo is able to look beyond the veils of this world, and he traces Angelina to a mysterious train.

Here are 50 short stories about investors in musicals, angels taking walks on the wild side, a man risking his life for a jelly donut, and much more.

Lucas Trust has it all - money, a mansion, an island, a gorgeous girlfriend. But his shadowy past returns and Willie, who has been painting Luke's house, suddenly finds himself trying to solve a murder mystery. Meanwhile Short Top Detroit, a fictional paperback detective, has taken up residence in Willie's head. But Short Top isn't a very good detective, and Willie finds himself in some bizarre and dangerous situations.

Fifty humorous little stories, inspired by Hollywood horror flicks, featurning werewolves, vampies, mummies, zombies, ghouls, and ghosts. But the writer, Meatball Fulton, has bent these in quite a different direction. Some of the titles speak for themselves: "Zombie Al's Big Night Out", "When the Wolf Woman Wets Her Whistle", "Loathsome Sally Under the Texas Moon", "Detective Barney Big Butt Meets Little Marvin the Midget", and 46 more.

Little Louie Lafitte discovers an old rusty streetcar in a New Orleans graveyard. The seats are occupied by skeletons wearing eye patches and bandannas. Suddenly, they emit a hair-raising, "Harr Harr!"

Little Louie, who is a direct descendent of the famous Pirates Lafitte, realizes the skeletons are itching for a good pirate adventure. And so, the ghostly streetcar creaks and groans out of the mist, picking up unsuspecting tourists. Good devilish fun for all ages.

The natives of a far-flung archipelago are tring to turn their islands into a fantasy world called "Land of Zoots". There are rainbow bubble abodes, giant inflatable walking/talking toes, and trees that grow feathers. While Rodant Kapoor is leading a troupe of tiny Terminator Teddy Bears, Ruby is trying to find out who is behind all this. Dan it be, the Wizard of Zoots?

Invisible balls of energy are causing hallucinations within the walled city of Old Quebec. Jack and Mojo try to locate the source of these "eyes". When a little girl with pigtails, smoking a cigar, is seen about town, Jack suspects Litte Frieda is involved. When Jack speaks to Claudine on his cell, she appears before him; when he hangs up, she vanishes.

Somewhere in the tropics, yet another beach resort is being built. As they bulldoze a road through a valley the locals consider sacred (the dwelling of a Nature Spirit), the jungle begins to spring up everywhere else. At Maria's Cafe', chairs are sprouting leaves, vines are creeping over the counter, and orchids are growing from the walls. Meanwhile, Jack, Mojo and Claudine are attempting to prove the Nature Spirit not only exists, she may have just begun to "even the score".

In a little theatre, off off off Broadway, Simon Gray is attempting to direct a production of Macbeth, but every actress who plays Witch #3 disappears. Simon calls in his old friend, Mojo Sam. When Mojo sees an actress vanish before his eyes, he brings in Little Frieda. When Little Frieda plays Witch #3, she also disappears. When she reappears in the Realm of the Muse, Little Frieda meets the real Witch #3, the one Shakespeare based his character on, and she is sizzling mad and out for revenge.

Jack and his crew accept an invitation from an eccentric billionaire who has built a castle on a Carribbean island. What first appears to be a replica of a medieval fortress turns out to be a very high tech castle, with robot valets, and rooms with floor-to-ceiling plasma screens. In the middle of the night, Jack's crew begins to encounter their own "personal demons", first in their dreams and then right before their eyes.

In "The Underworld", Ruby investigates the dark force within Magnifico, City of Malls, while Inanna journeys into the Seven Gates of the Underworld. In "The Invisible World", Ruby finds herself in the Astral Bar & Grill, where the decor adapts to each person's personality.

Wherever Rodant Kapoor attempts to hide in this vast universe of ours, his Mother always find him. So when the Techno-Witches, Onoffon and Offonoff ask Kapoor to try out "The Rapturizer", a device they're invented that's based on "The Rapture" (where one ascends into Heaven), Kapoor gladly accepts. He steps into, "The Rapturizer", and Poof, Rodant is Rapturized! But Mother Kapoor, claiming she's about to kick the bucket, convinces Ruby, along with Teru & And/Or, to go after her wayward son.

This is the very first Ruby story (before even Ruby 1). Ruby Tuesday (that's what she was called) is hired by Colonel Abulah Abdullah of the star cluster, Saudi Asteriodia, to find Cleo, a missing planet. Ruby discovers there's much more behind this mystery when she encounters the villainous Forked Forefinger of Fong. Also includes four Ruby pilot episodes that had never been released before.

Ruby, Teru, And/Or and Rodant Kapoor return to the planet of Illuboo Roi. T. J. Teru has been invited by Prince Haw-Hee-Bop to open the Forbidden Tombs of the ancient Phar-Oops. Of course, the wily Prince forgot to mention the Black Curse of the Phar-Oops. Once inside the tombs, they discover the gigantic sarcophagi of all 14 Phar-Oops. They also unleash the dreaded Curse!

When a beautiful Indian woman hands Jack his own business card, which she claims he gave her Aunt over 40 years ago, there is no doubt in Jack's mind that another quest is about to unfold. Before the riddle is solved, Jack is off to India.

Ruby, Teru, and Kapoor arrive on the planet of Mobius-Morpheus, a planet of Dreamers. Someone is tampering with their dreams. While Ruby is attempting to discover who is behind this, she stumbles upon her old friend, the Tookah, a shrewd observer of the Dream Weavers.

Illuboo Roi is a planet inhabited by pear-shaped beings with pointed heads. Ruby is hired by Oop Boop, an Illuboo, to uncover a secret society known as "The Illusionati". When the Digital Circus is invited to Illuboo Roi, Ruby, Teru, And/Or, and Rodant Kapoor travel incognito as performers. Meanwhile, doppelgrangers, grown out of bio-flesh, are replacing infuential Illuboos, perhaps even Oop Boop!

Ruby steps into a tavern called "The Tickly Tentacle". Standing behind the bar, polishing four glasses at the same time, is her old friend the Tookah. Since it's a quiet afternoon, the Tookah relates to Ruby some of the schemes and scams he's run on other planets, and how he barely escaped with his tentacles intact.